So, we are moving to Oklahoma.
In about 16/17 days, we will pack up all of our belongings and leave Colorado behind, in residence only.
My family and my roots are still here, so I anticipate that at a minimum, the kids and I will be visiting good Ole Colorado quite often. I am excited to live close to my in laws, such great folks, but it will be hard to move away from my family. The last time I did this, I was only 19, single and no kids. So it was a little easier, and even then, there was no set time frame for which I was going to be away.
There are many positives that go along with this move, but there are drawbacks too.
For one, Chris filed a motion to relocate his children with us. The days are ticking away in which his ex wife can file a disagreement to the motion, if she does not, then the courts are supposed to set a hearing date in which we will all go in and find out the outcome.
Personally, I am not a grudge holder, but since Chris has gone ahead to start his job in OK already, Lisa, his ex wife refuses to let Connor come over to our house to even visit. OUCH!!!
Connor has a very close relationship with Owen, and even Donovan and I feel that her refusal to let him visit us
(read that, not even come over to say HI) is doing irreparable damage to Connor's emotional well being. Not only has his dad already moved, but when we asked him if he wanted to go with us, he said he did want to go, but he didn't want to leave, and we would never make him make such a difficult choice. So now his dad has moved and he can't see the rest of us with which he has such a close relationship. The poor kid, I can't imagine what is going through his head. I go to the boys school twice a week just to make sure he knows how much we all love him.
As far as Katie goes, with her drastic behavior changes in the past year, I hope the courts recognize that a change of residence and venue might be just the thing she needs. She has been hurting herself and I suspect she does it for attention( I saw the marks over Christmas and she begged me to not tell anyone, I did tell Chris, but with the way things are, there was not a whole lot he could do at the time), she failed about 3 of her classes at the gifted school she tried so hard to get accepted in to and now she has to go to a regular school--that's a lot for a 13 year old girl to deal with, but all of it happened during the time her mother allowed her to refuse parenting time with Chris. She still has a relationship with him but it's not nearly as good as is could be or should be if Lisa even acted a little like she supports both Katie and Connor having a relationship with their dad and his family. The fact that she flat out told me " You do not get visitation" tells me that she does not recognize or support the extended relationships that her children have with me, Donovan, Owen and my family.
I personally think that her refusal to accept that Chris is gone and has a family, that Connor for one loves, and if given a chance, Katie would too, makes this situation so much harder on everyone involved.
If I pray for anything, it's that the courts really examine the relationship Chris has tried to build with his kids and the obstacles the Lisa places in front of him to only make that harder. I hope they grant him the relocation so that they can come with us and get a fresh start. Neither Chris or I thinks that Lisa is a bad parent, or insufficient in some way, but the children have not really been given the full opportunity to build a healthy relationship with their father or I and that would be so great if they could.
I know that my parents will miss having the grand kids near by, and the possibility of not being 'present' when #5 gets here, but they will come visit us and we will see them regularly, my sister too, so I think our relationships will only get better, if that's possible.
Seeing as how Chris has already made the initial move down there, that leaves me here with 2/4 kids, 4 months pregnant ( which by the way is going splendidly.. I have only gained 5 lbs so far!!)and about 85% of the packing...We will be renting a truck and flying up one of Chris' cousins to help us load > we had considered a moving company but after getting estimates that ranged from $4000-$10000, we decided that we could do it on our own for much less cost.
Donovan happens to have a football game the day we move, so who knows, maybe the men load us up while the ladies all go watch the game. Who knows how it will work out, I just know it will.

My apologies for the long draws of breath between posts, I never know just how busy my life will be. I know it will be busy, but to what extent is the mystery.

If I manage to post once more before the move, SUPER!!!-- if not, my next post will be from Oklahoma City, Oklahoma, the new home of the Mallow family.

Thanks for checking in.